Silhouettes
by Bree-2006
Summary: Tidus's thoughts on his father Jecht and his feelings towards the tormoil his father put him and his mother through. (One-shot song fic to Silhouettes by Smile Empty Soul) RR


**Silhouettes**

**By: Bree-2006**

**Disclaimer: I don't own final fantasy or the song Silhouettes by Smile Empty Soul.**

**AN: This fan fiction happens before the end of final fantasy 10.**

**Read and review I don't accept flames.**

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How does it feel to be sin?

**_'Silhouettes above a cradle, hold me down_**

**_They wont let me go the wrong way_**

**_My mother taught me all the fables, told me how_**

**_In the end all the sinners have to pay…'_**

Destroying others lives make you happy now? You didn't have enough fun doing it to mother and me?

After everything you've done I hope you don't expect me to forgive you? Leaving mom and I to fend for ourselves in the rigorous city of Zanarkand? I hope you didn't think I was old enough to take care of her. She deserved so much better than you. Did you expect mom to be happy…because she wasn't.

**_'I don't wanna live like my mother,_**

**_I don't wanna let fear rule my life'_**

I had to watch her suffer over your disappearance. She feared that you would never return and she would live her life without you, I would always tell her that she always had me but she still refused to look at me. She would tell me that _'I looked to much like you'. _She began to lose faith in herself and she had completely lost faith in me. She thought there had to be a perfectly logical reason why you had left, you were a saint to her. You could do nothing wrong. I guess being a jackass to your only child wasn't considered the wrong thing to do.

She didn't even come to my championship game. It brought back too many _'terrible memories'_ to her. You were the only one on her mind. She barely thought about her only son anymore and when she did it was as I was just another disappointment in her life. I guess I didn't turn out right 'cause I didn't have a father figure in my life…I didn't have you in my life…nor did I want to have you in my life.

I think you were just scared. Your not a real man to me, a real man would be there for their families and they wouldn't destroy their sons self-confidence.

**_'I don't wanna live like my father,_**

**_I don't wanna give up before I die'_**

I think you gave up on us, maybe because you didn't want the responsibility of raising a family. I always heard stories from mom about how wonderful you were, yet not once did I get to see the wonderful person she made you out to be.

**_'He worked so hard his bones are breaking_**

**_He wore them down but long ago he lost the feeling…'_**

When I would ask her why the Jecht I knew wasn't as great as she said he was she would always tell me. 'He did wonderful things for Zanarkand he brought us all the champion ship'

Well guess what…so did I…twice.

**_'His good intentions leave me shaking, show me how,_**

**_I don't ever want to end up like he did…'_**

What now dad? Are you actually proud of me…I doubt it. To you I'm still the whiny crybaby I used to be. I guess making your family miserable wasn't good enough for you. Now you have to attack Spira and make them feel as much hate towards you as I do.

**_'I don't wanna live like my mother,_**

**_I don't wanna let fear rule my life,_**

Well it ain't gonna happen any more. I was sent here to stop you and that's what I plan to do. Because of your stupid mistakes I had to leave my home and my mother, but it's not that bad here. They have blitz ball and I've met many new people…not that you care. There's some incredible people here like Braska's daughter Yuna. She said she met you and that you were a wonderful man…what do people see in you that I don't?

**_'I don't wanna live like my father'_**

**_I don't wanna give up before I die'_**

All I know is when I'm a father I plan to be the best one I can be. I want to be nothing like you.

**_'When I have kids_**

**_I wont put chains on their wrists, I wont'_**

I'll treat my children with love, the kind of love you never showed mom and me. I know now that every word that you told me when I was younger just made me stronger. I would have never made it back home without your critism.

**_'I'll tell them this,_**

**_There's nothing in this world that you can't be if you want it enough'_**

But things are different now. Yuna's on her pilgrimage to stop you and I am by her side along with our friends we shall put an end to your madness.

**_'I don't wanna live like my mother,_**

**_I don't wanna let fear rule my life_**

**_I don't wanna live like my father,_**

**_I don't wanna give up before I die'

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**Read and Review!**

**Dedicated to my sister Sorasblade: Keep on writing sis, and keep on inspiring me.**


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